Chapter Two |
While the Scouts
were at the Doe house having tea, Princess Candy Floss had retired to his
office in the society's secret hideout. His office had a pink, swirling
candy cane decor to it. It was bizarre. He was looking into
the mirror beside his closet, admiring his gaudy, fuscia ball gown, one
he had knicked from his girlfriend. His girlfriend had no idea that
he was a member of this society, which by now seemed more like a cult.
Candy Floss danced in front of the mirror with a really stupid looking
smile on his face.
Let me tell you
a bit about Candy Floss. He was very wealthy. He had children.
Candy Floss was an old man with back problems. Basically, that's
all his fellow society members knew about him. Well, except Horse
Lady. She knew a lot about everyone in the society.
Candy Floss picked
up his newspaper (which was delivered to him by Calamity Jane every afternoon)
and went over the day's headlines, wondering where he and the society should
strike next.
***
Serena and Raye
were fighting. Again.
"Look, I want
to go to Harrods, Serena. Mrs. Doe told me their having some sort of sale,
and you are NOT going to keep me from shopping!" Raye shouted.
"But I want to
go to the rib restaurant! They're having a buffet special and I wanna go!"
Serena wailed. Raye glared at her. "Serena, we just had lunch.
You'll live," she said. Amy looked up from her book.
"Please stop
arguing. Serena, don't sit on that stool like that! You'll
break it," she said. The girls were assembled in the Doe family's
kitchen. They were debating over where to go for the day. "Serena,
I really think we should go to Harrods first. Then we can stop by
that rib restaurant for dinner. How does that sound?" Amy asked.
"Sounds okay," Serena grumbled.
Later on the
girls were in a park, feeding the pigeons. They had finished their
shopping spree fairly quick, after the girls decided that Harrods was too
expensive.
"Wow, Mina.
This park is gorgeous," Lita breathed. Mina nodded as she and Lita
watched Serena and Raye chase each other with sticks covered in pigeon
poo. Mina looked around and noticed something very strange.
"Lita--where's
Amy?" Lita and Mina looked around. No Amy.
"She's right
here." The girls looked up, then down, then to their right. Lurking
in the bushes was the Power Rangers from the secret society. The
Pink Ranger had Amy in a choke hold. The Red, Blue, and Black Rangers
were behind her, weilding strange looking weapons.
"We've come to
take you lot hostage. Sic them boys!" the Pink Ranger commanded.
The other rangers sprang into action, attacking the other girls and disturbing
the innocent pigeons.
"We'd better
transform! Moon Crystal Power!" Serena transformed into Sailor Moon. Mina,
Raye and Lita did the same. Sailor Moon glared at the Pink Ranger.
"Let my friend
go. Now," Sailor Moon commanded. The Pink Ranger made a snorting noise
(each Ranger was wearing a helmet). "And who are you?" she asked.
"I am Sailor
Moon, champion of love and justice! I fight wrongs and triumph over evil,
and that means you!" Sailor Moon annoucned. The Pink Ranger laughed. The
other rangers continued to attack the remaining Scouts.
The Pink Ranger
turned to Amy. "Soon, you and your little friends will be under our control.
You will be our pawns and help lead our soceity to world domination! Do
you have any final words before you are brainwashed?" the Pink Ranger asked.
Amy nodded. "Yes I do. You're toast!" Amy elbowed the Pink Ranger in her
stomach and broke free. She then transformed into Sailor Mercury.
"Mercury Bubble
Blast!" A fog settled over the park. "P...erm, Red Ranger, where are you?!
I need help!" the Pink Ranger pleaded with panic in her voice. The Red
Ranger was fighting with Sailor Jupiter. "I'm over here!" came the reply.
The Pink Ranger snorted in disgust. "Where's here?" she demanded.
"Right in your
face! Mars Fire Ignite!" Sailor Mars let her firey attack loose in the
Pink Rangers' face. Her helmet was charred as the fog finally cleared.
"Ugh!" the Pink
Ranger looked around. There were five Sailor Scouts against the four Rangers.
They'd need another member. "Listen you, this isn't over by a long shot!
We'll be back!" The four Rangers slumped away, completely defeated. The
Sailor Scouts cheered.
***
"Wow. A new enemy.
Good thing we arrived here in England, right?" Mina said. The other girls
nodded. They were at the Doe residence, in the (small) guest house, going
over the day's events.
"Well, we need
to find out about this new enemy. Amy, have you found anything yet?" Luna
said. Amy sat down and looked over the information on her mini computer.
"Nothing, Luna. Absolutely nothing. I don't think they're the
usual, run-of-the-mill enemies, like Queen Beryl, the two aliens, or the
Negamoon family." Amy said. Serena sighed. "What are
we going to do about it? How are we supposed to locate them?"
she asked.
"Hmm. That's
a toughie. We just need to be prepared. In the meantime, I'll
continue to find more information. All I get is information on the
Power Rangers television series." Amy said. Raye snapped her
fingers. "You know, they said something about leading their 'society'
to world domination. Somehow, I get the feeling that they're just
members of an even larger society. But the question is, how do we
find out about this secret society? I mean, what is the society's
name? Does it have a purpose?" Raye wondered. The other
girls sighed.
"Well, like Amy
said, we'll need to be prepared." Artemis said. The girls peeked
over Amy's shoulder to get a look at the information on the computer screen.
Suddenly, something came up...
***
The secret society was holding an
emergency meeting. It was to discuss the attack on the Power Rangers.
Princess Candy Floss was wearing a blue gown, pink platforms, and a diamond
necklace. He was also wearing a Mardi Gras style mask.
"Right then.
The meeting shall begin. Calamity Jane, are you taking notes?" Candy
Floss began, looking at Calamity Jane. Jane nodded and Candy Floss
returned his gaze to the other members of the society. Standing in
front of his candy cane podium was the four Power Rangers looking quite
dejected. "All right, you four. What happened?" he asked.
"It went like
this. We were in some park to take these five girls hostage.
Suddenly, they transformed from regular clothing into these sailor-type
costumes. They had strange powers. That's how the Pink Ranger
got scorched--the sailor in red got her with her fire." The Red Ranger
explained. The Blue Ranger nodded in agreement. Horse Lady
snorted.
"So basically
what your telling us is that you failed? Failure won't get you very
far in this society, you know." Horse Lady snapped. She was
wearing a brown dress, brown oxford shoes, and a sickly-yellow cardigan.
Her hair was piled up in a huge bee-hive style hairdo. Candy Floss
raised his hand. "Now, we can't expect all of our members to be perfect.
There's a time for success and a time for faliure. Believe me, I
know. Since we are at this meeting, I have decided to show you something
that will help us find this group of sailor girls. I was going to
wait until the next regular meeting, but the events that have occurred
have made me realize that it is important to introduce this to all of you."
Candy Floss opened his laptop and started up a program. It looked
like a search engine. He typed in the keywords "secret society, sailor,
girls, five, magic powers, special powers." The information on the
Sailor Scouts came up. The program then searched for a computer owned
by the Scouts. It found Amy's computer and connected the two.
The society members
looked on with awe. "We are now connected with their computer.
So, what would you like to tell these five girls?" Candy Floss asked.
Horse Lady raised her hand. "I wish to speak to the five girls."
she said. Candy Floss handed the laptop to her. She opened
up Microsoft Outlook Express and composed the message. When she was
done, she copied Amy's e-mail address and sent the letter.
***
The other girls
gasped. Amy's web browser was open, and it now signaled that she
had mail. She opened her e-mail account (on AOL) and read the new
message:
Dear Sailor girls,Serena gasped. "Oh my goodness! She's coming for us! What are we going to do?" Serena cried. Raye grinned evilly. "We kick some major ass, that's what!" Raye looked at the others. "C'mon, Amy, scan their IP and find out where they are." Amy complied as the others gave themselves a pep talk.We know about your attack on the four Power Rangers. We shall find you and do one of two things.
There is nothing you can do to stop us. We know where you are, and we are coming after you very soon.
- Utterly destroy you and take your powers and use them as our own.
- Force you to join our society and aid us in taking over the world.
Regards,
Horse Lady
Vice President of the "Secret Society."
***
Princess Candy
Floss looked at the message. "Very good Horse Lady." he said.
Calamity Jane raised her hand. "I have a marvelous idea. I
was on the internet a while ago and saw this little society. Bunch
of little girls calling themselves the Sexays."
Horse Lady frowned.
"Sexays? What the hell is that? Isn't the word 'sexy'?" Horse
Lady demanded. Calamity Jane nodded. The Blue Ranger snorted.
"I suppose you want our society to be called the 'sexays'? Come on,
what a pathetic name cooked up by a bunch of girls who can't spell.
I don't want to be any part of a society that calls themselves the 'sexays'."
he said.
"Do you have
any other suggestions?" Candy Floss asked. The Pink Ranger
snickered. "Hey, lets call ourselves the Canday Rangers! No,
I'm just joking. Maybe we ought to stick to 'Secret Society'."
she said. Candy Floss shook his head. "No, that is too obvious.
Any votes for 'sexay'?" he asked. Everybody but the Rangers
and Horse Lady raised their hands. Candy Floss smiled. "We
are officially the 'sexays.' he said.
***
Horse Lady was
looking through her e-mail when she got a very nasty letter from one of
the original sexays. It had been several days after their renaming.
It read,
Dear Horse Lady,Horse Lady rolled her eyes. She then began to compose a message of her own.Gee, what a lovely name. I'm sure it suits you. Look, we don't want you taking our name. We are sexay. You aren't. Get over it. All of you British aristocrats are a bunch of retarded, uglay walruses anyway.
If you don't change the name, we are coming after you. Period. You will wish you had never been born. You are pathetic. Hell, I'm sure you wish you had never been born ALREADY! I'd love to make you feel more worthless. Bottom line--change the name. Or suffer the consequences.
Un-sincerely,
Queen of the Sexays.
Dear Queen of the Sexays,Horse Lady, pleased with her letter, clicked the send button and sat back in her seat, shaking her head in disbelief. Could there really be that many morons in this world? All the better for the Secret Society to take over the world....As but one member of my secret society, I have to say that I completely disagree with the name 'sexay.' Unfortunately, I was outnumbered, and my colleagues decided to name themselves the sexays.
I will be the first to say that the word 'sexay' is a reflection of poor spelling. It doesn't take a genius to come up with a stupid name like 'sexay'.
From your remarks, I can only assume that you're an American who has absolutely no knowledge of British aristocracy. I can accept that--after all, you ARE an American (and a stupid one at that, since you misspelled 'ugly'. Before sending me any correspondence, learn how to spell first, or just use the bloody spell check).
I regret that I must end this letter here, but let me tell you something first--I am quite glad I was born. The only reason why I would wish I was never born is the fact that I have to share this planet with brain dead idiots like you.
Un-sincerely,
Horse Lady
Vice President of the Secret SocietyPS I have already taken steps to cleanse my society of your ridiculous name, as you will see in my signature.
Serena: Well, what an interesting
episode. Sorry for the profanity by Horse Lady and Raye--after all,
this is a children's show.
Raye: Oh, whatever, Serena.
Let's go over the day's events. We went touring, and got attacked
by a bunch of retarded Power Rangers. Fortunately, we kicked their
behinds!
Serena: We surely did.
And Amy used her mini computer a lot. Looks like it functions like
any old PC! Isn't that neato? I wish Luna would give me one.
Luna: Ahem, let us continue.
The Rangers failed to get the job done. Girls and boys, it is always
good to do your best.
Serena: Oh, Lunaaaa!
Duh, they already know that! Then the secret society temporarily
named themselves the Sexays, which resulted in a fall out between the real
sexays and the um, fake ones.
Raye: Oh, god, what is a sexay
anyway? Looks like SOMEONE can't spell. Don't you agree Serena?
Serena: Yes, I do. Okay,
lesson of the day: Do your best, don't steal other society's names,
and don't mess with Horse Lady, cos she'll put you in your place.
Raye: Yeah, that woman is
feisty!
Serena: Sailor Moon says!
Heehee! PS I liked the foxays better anyway!
Luna: Serena!
Serena: Sorry.